SHOULD ONE APPLY MAKE-UP IN PUBLIC?

Makeup is an essential item which every woman who cares about her appearance in public must own. It is considered one of the most important accessories for a woman and I am pretty sure a woman feels vulnerable or exposed when she accidentally leaves home without any makeup or lipstick.

Makeup is also responsible for many women's long periods of dressing up. Many women will agree that it takes them between 15 and 20 minutes to apply makeup and if they have to answer phone call in between, it will take even much longer.  

The routine includes applying liquid foundation, mascara, eye shadow, a second mascara, brush a dab of blush on the cheeks, lip gloss and so on. Then there is the fixing of her hair, choosing what shoes to wear and colour matching everything. 

I am not sure whether the wardrobe comes before makeup but either way, it is one of the reasons why it takes women too long to dress up. She may even go through outfits before settling on one of them. Then comes jewellery and shoes which have to blend with the handbag of the day.

By the time she is ready, you may have finished watching 2 episodes of Everybody Hates Chris. It may be a tremendous hassle but by the time she is ready, you will appreciate her beauty. If you are a married man, do not rush you wife into dressing up because every woman has to look the best she can and your woman is one of them. All the women that you see in the street looking great, they go through a lot of hassle to look the way they do.

However, I have seen some women applying makeup in public places. In the elevator, on the bus, in the cab, or even while walking down the road. I may be wrong but I don't think that it is correct behaviour. One study on women found that more than two thirds of women do this. 

Many women give excuses that there are unavoidable circumstances when you experience a cosmetic mishap and you have no choice but to apply or make touch-ups in public. 

We know that applying makeup is not a top secret or an environmental risk but it is a big no when it comes to doing it in public. 

One etiquette expert joked about it by saying, "To put on all your makeup in public is as bad as eating in the street. Some things should be kept behind closed doors. Makeup should always be used to enhance your features, creating some magic in the transformation. It would seem senseless to reveal your beauty secrets to all and sundry."

Applying a quick coat of lipstick in public is understandable and acceptable. The main reason why women apply makeup is for beauty purposes so how can someone be assured of doing a perfect job on bumpy ride? Some even go to the extent of using shop windows in place of a mirror. 

One thing that I must mention is that many women that I have personally seen applying makeup in public are from a lower class. These women seem not to have enough time to that at home because of the nature of work that they do. Most of them have to report at work as early as 07:00 hours. If you look at how long it takes for a woman to apply makeup and then dress up, it is obvious that these women do not have enough time to do that at home.

But it still remains a mystery why they can not wait until they reach their work places and then sneak into the ladies' room to apply the makeup. After all, many of us who see them in the morning do not even bother to notice if they have any makeup or not. 

There is also the fact that when a woman is applying makeup on any form of transportation, that could lead to mascara going in the eyeball instead of the eyelashes. While the intention was to make you look great, you may end up looking like you have a part in the Living Dead movie.

No matter how beautiful you may be, no one really enjoys seeing a woman applying makeup in public, excuse yourself to the restroom to do it from there.

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles, freedigiatlphotos.net

IN THE GRIP OF A SERIAL DATER

Jeffrey Dahmer, Ted Bundy, Charles Manson and Jack the Ripper all have one thing in common. They were serial killers who committed multiple acts of murder in a seemingly random manner or fashion. Many of us may think these people were insane because what normal person could slaughter another human for sheer pleasure? 

The FBI defines serial murder as:

• A minimum of three to four victims, with a "cooling off" period in between.
• The killer is usually a stranger to the victim - the murders appear unconnected or random
• The murders reflect a need to sadistically dominate the victim
• The murder is rarely "for profit", the motive is psychological, not material
• The victim may have "symbolic" value for the killer, method of killing may reveal this meaning
• Killers often choose victims who are vulnerable (prostitutes, runaways, etc.)

However, the truth is that serial killers are not insane (maybe with a few exceptions) because if they were, they wouldn’t plan their executions so elaborately and very carefully to avoid being detected. Jeffrey Dahmer himself said, "A mind can be evil without being abnormal".

Many studies have been conducted to try and find out the motives or what drives serial killers to commit their crimes. During a child’s development, there is a period in which he learns about love, trust and empathy and also how to interact with other human beings. It is believed that if these traits have not been imprinted upon the child during that period, then that child will find it impossible to learn them later in life.

Another theory attributed to serial killers is neglect and abuse. This includes both physical and sexual abuse and it causes these individuals to grow up without a sense of anyone but themselves. What must be noted is that there are many people who grow up in the above situations but they never turn out to be serial killers. Some grow up to be very respectable and successful people.

When faced with a trial, many serial killers plead “not guilty” and cite insanity as the reason for their actions. This is because the only other acceptable explanation forserial murder is inanity. Some serial killers have been diagnosed by psychologists and psychiatrists as psychopaths, meaning they are compelled to harm other people, enjoy causing fear and they feel no remorse for their actions.

It is not every day that one can run into a serial killer and chances are that you may never run into one in your lifetime. But if you’re a woman, there are chances of you running into a serial dater. Men also are victims of female serial daters but these are very rare.

A serial dater may not rip your heart or bowels out with a knife. He may not strangle you to death or drown you in a tub full of water but he will leave your heart broken and in tatters. 

A serial dater is someone who engages in the process of systematically dating an obscene amount of people in a short span of time. He may pounce on you through internet dating, bar dating, long distance flirtations, phone service dating, blind dating, match making, one night stands, and friends with benefits. In some words, he is what is popularly known as a player and will any opportunity to lure his victims. 

Many times a serial dater will only last a few weeks in a relationship and vanish. If you look at the definition and psychological profile of a serial killer and that of a serial dater, they are actually pretty similar. Their motives are categorized as visionary, mission-oriented, hedonistic and power or control.

Like serial killers, serial daters have their own perceived psychological effects stemming from their childhood. Some are affected by romantic rejections experienced earlier in life or they grew up in a dysfunctional family without experiencing close intimate relationships which they may have longed for. This is said to leave them distrustful of other people.

A serial dater will break up what is perfectly a great and promising relationship.

You may say that's fine with you because the leech has just moved out in time before you fell so deep into him. But what if you found out that you did not use protection and you're pregnant? There is no doubt that you will do anything to trace him and make him share the responsibility of looking after the child. But usually such men leave behind them a string of other women and chances are that they also have a corresponding number of siblings. 

I was watching a video on YouTube where this man has 22 kids from 14 different women. Ironically, he remembers all his kids' names. He brags that he named them all so it was easy for him to remember each child's name. I doubt that it is also easy when it comes to taking care of  their needs. His excuse for having this many kids was that he was young, ambitious and he loved women. 

I also honestly do not think this man's baby mamas did not know that the man was multiple dating. And if they knew, how come they did not use any protection? Maybe they were just competing to see who gets more babies out of him? 

If a serial dater comes back and assumes full responsibility of taking care of the child, you must be very lucky. Serial killers always make sure their victim is dead before leaving the crime scene and they will try by all means not to leave a trail. The serial dater also makes sure that when he leaves, he will never be easily brought to book. He will find another woman or even fall back to one of his stupid earlier victims. This will make you start fighting that woman  until you get to know that she already has 2 kids with him.

It is at this point that you must make an intelligent decision. Should you forget about him and move on or should you stay and finish the fight? This is usually a hard choice because this period is filled with mixed emotions and anger. Many women behave like a pendulum, swinging from side to side, not knowing what is the right thing to do. 

You may try to stay away from him and concentrate on other things but the bills start piling up. Most of your time has been taken up by taking care of the baby, leaving you with less time to work extra hard or maybe even work at all. If the child is sick, staying up at night alone or taking care of medical bills will make you feel  more angry at him. Your imagination will be filled with images of him sleeping comfortably in another woman's arms while you are struggling alone. 

The best alternative when you find out that you are a victim of a serial dater is to just completelty forget about him and stay strong on your own. Something that does not kill you will only make you strong. Consider yourself fortunate that you did not stay in that relationship for a long time or something worse could have happened to you. 

Women who try to hang on and fight to the end usually lose the fight. The serial dater will keep adding more victims to his hit list while you are trying to make him stay with you. Unfortunately, many women use sex as a last option to make him stay but this usually backfires and they find themselves having another child with him.

Serial daters are charmers but they are human too and there is a way of knowing them. If you meet someone and their dating history is not very clear or they do not want to delve into it, then chances are that he or she is a serial dater. Do not completely trust anyone who has dated more than 4 people in the last 2 years. 

Photo courtesy of imagerymajestic freedigitalphotos.net

WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW WON'T KILL YOU

 
Mobile phones have made our everyday activities easier. We can communicate with our loved ones and do business easily by just pushing a few buttons. When we are waiting in a long queue we can plug in the earpiece and listen to our favourite collection of music. We can also watch a movie on the bus or check out what is new on the internet. With the cell phone in your hands, you virtually have the world in your hands.

Unfortunately, nothing good comes without a price. The cellphone, despite it's many advantages, also has a share of its bad side. Many relationships have been broken because of the cellphone.

Picture yourself in this situation. Your wife is in the bathroom and you're sitting alone in the living room reading the daily paper. Suddenly, your wife's phone starts vibrating on the table where she left it. It is an incoming call. You decide to ignore the ringing phone and continue reading the paper. After all phone etiquette is that you should not answer another person's phone unless you have been given instructions to do so.

After ignoring it the first time, the phone starts ringing again but you still ignore it. On the third attempt, you pick it up and look at the caller I.D. There is no name. You press the answer button.

"Hello"

Instead of hearing a voice on the side, the call is cut. You put the phone down and wondering how rude some people could be. Immediately your wife comes out of the bathroom you tell her that there was a call and when you answered it the line was dead. She quickly picks up the phone top check the caller's identity.

"Who is it?" you ask.

"I don't know" she replies but when the phone rings again after an hour or so, instead of answering it in your presence, she moves away out of earshot.

In most cases, this is a perfect scenario for an argument or an interrogation. Many people would be suspicious that their spouse is having an affair. If that is true or not, the biggest mistake that anyone can do is to move away their spouse's earshot to answer a call. The best thing that anyone can do is after answering such a call, you must tell your partner who it was that you were taking too.

The cellphone has just complicated the cheating game and it is becoming harder to catch a cheating partner using the cellphone. Some ingenious people have created Apps that make it even harder to do this.

For example, Slydial mobile app allows a cheating man to call his mistress at anytime even when her husband is around without being found out. This app directly calls the voice mail and plans for  rendezvous will be communicated. Another app called CATE (Call and text eraser) helps adulterers by maintaining a hidden log of messages, calls and contacts. The information is stored in the app and can be deleted with just one touch. If someone walks in while you're reading the secret message and you don't want to be seen closing the app, all you need to do is shake the phone and everything will be minimised.

Another app is called Tiger Text app which allows a cheater to send messages with a deletion timer. After a designated amount of time passes, the message will be deleted from the recipient's phone. Blackberry has an app called BlackBook which allows users to create a list of hidden contacts and accompanying text messages that are kept separate from the regular phone address book and inbox.

There is no doubt that these apps and many others like them have made it even harder for victims of cheating partners to get hold of any incriminating evidence through the phone. However, not every phone can install these apps and many people especially in the developing world are still grappling with how to use apps effectively.

Not to be left out, there are also apps that will help you track down a cheating spouse. The iPhone has an app which you can use when you suspect that your spouse is cheating. This app is loaded with software which can let you spy on text, email accounts, computers, learn how to find hidden passwords, spy on cellphone records, secretly install spyware on a cellphone, GPS tracking and much more. There are many more apps available for Android phones too.

But above all this, there is the old traditional way of spying or checking your spouse's phone activities and this is by physically going through his or her calls and mailbox. This may be an outdated method but it has helped catch many cheaters. No matter how clever someone is one day they will lose their guard and leave unwanted information for the snooping partner.

Couples go through each other's phones trying to find any clues about their suspicious movements and in many cases this hasn't been well received by the owner of the phone. Many people believe it is wrong to snoop around in other people's phones because it is an intrusion in their privacy. On the other hand, some argue that their is no such thing as privacy between married couples. The other partner has a right to check the phone records if they suspect something is going on.

Here are a few comments from a debate on Facebook on whether it was right to check your partner's phones when they are sleeping or in the shower.

"I think the best thing is to mind your own business and ask God to give you a partner whom you won't suspect of cheating and one who won't cheat"

"It is wrong but it is not a big deal either. If you have any reason to do that, the best time is when he is watching and not when he is sleeping"

"A right and successful marriage holds no secrets. Whatever the husband is doing the wife should know and whatever the wife is doing the husband should know. But when one is hiding phones from the other that means that person is not straight."

"It's not okay. In the first place why date a person you don't trust?"

"Checking with their consent is okay but snooping is not right. You will find something that will kill you. Every person has a right to privacy and let us respect that. What you don't know wont kill you."

I don't agree with the last part of the above comment. I don't agree that what you don't know won;t kill you because many people have died in situations where if they had known, they would have had a choice to save themselves. Nothing is as cruel as a person infecting a spouse  with HIV when the woman was ignorant about his promiscuous lifestyle.

Moreover, it is human instinct to probe when you suspect that something is wrong and most people who snoop do this because they suspect that their partner is having an affair and in many cases this could be true.

A parent may occasionally check her children's rooms and if one day that parent finds a condom in one of the drawers, would you blame her for snooping and that it was her fault that she found the condom?


Image courtesy of postersize freedigitalphotos.net

SEXY AND HORNY DEMONS

I had been sitting in front of the television screen for about 30 minutes. I was tuned in to a Christian channel and on the screen there was a woman being held by two female Ushers. The woman was teetering from side to side with the two ushers keeping her from falling. The Preacher was asking the woman questions.

“Who are you and where do you come from?”

“I am the great viper from the ocean.” the woman replied.

“What have you done to this woman?” the preacher asked.

“She is my wife. I don’t want her to get married so I chase away all the good men who want to marry her.”

Then the preacher touched the woman’s forehead and shoved her backwards. “I command you in the name of Jesus to come out.” he said.

The woman fell on the ground and started writhing. This took a couple of minutes before she lay still. The preacher told her to stand up and as soon as she stood up, she looked shocked.

The preacher then asked, “Do you know what you just said?”

“No” replied the woman.

“The demon that was troubling you has been cast out by Jesus.” The preacher explained to her.

Another woman was brought up. She had an angry expression on her face and her breathing was heavy and laboured. Her eyes kept rolling back into their sockets.  When the preacher asked her who she was, her reply was almost identical to the other woman’s.

“I come from the Indian Ocean.” She answered in a West African accent.

“What have you done to this woman?” asked the preacher.

The woman threw her head back and laughed. “What a stupid question to ask.”

The preacher repeated the question. “I said what have you done to this woman?”

There was a brief pause before the woman said. “I own her.”

“How do you own her?”

“She is mine. I make love to her and I do not want her to prosper. I have stunted her progress.”

“But why are you doing this to her?”

“I hate her. She does not obey my orders.”

After her, another woman was brought forward and her predicament was the same. She was also "married" to a spiritual husband. The spirit was tormenting her life and bringing so much misery into he life. I saw about six women brought to the Pastor to have their demons cast out before I decided to change the Channel. There were no men who came forward to have their demons cast out.  

I have watched these programmes before and that has been the case almost every time. More women than men seem to be victims of these spirits.  Is the spiritual world only full of male demons? How come there are very few men who are "married" to demons? 

Another thing that I observed is that most of these spirits claim to be snakes and come from the ocean or water and they are extremely abusive to their victims. It is like being married to an abusive husband. 

I am not an expert on this topic so I am not going to make weird conclusions. Many women have spoken about spiritual beings sleeping with them in the night and some have even spoken with these spirits and seen them physically.

Many people may have heard of Incubus and Succubus. The Incubus is said to be the spirit that has sexual intercourse with women while they sleep and the Succubus is a demon that assumes a female form to have sexual intercourse with men in their sleep. There are other demons associated with having sex with human beings and believe it or not, there is even a Top 10 list of Sex Demons.

 But why are there more women victims than men? And why are there more snake spirits that enter these women instead of any other animals, say for example a dog, cat, leopard or even a bird? We all know that when Satan decided to lie to Eve in the garden of Eden, he took the form of the snake so maybe there could be an explanation why there are so many snake spirits inside people.

And what happens to these demons once they are cast out of a person? Do these demons just leave the body of that person but still have the privilege of finding another host body somewhere? Is that spirit completely destroyed?

In the bible, it is documented that Jesus Christ encountered these demons on some occasions and the most common one is when he cast out the demons from a man and the demons begged Jesus, "If you drive us out, send us into the herd of pigs". (Matthew 8:31). A few things come to my mind when I read the demons' plea to Jesus.

The first is that the demons knew how powerful Jesus was and that they stood no chance against him. They had to ask him for an option which they thought was better for them. The other thing that comes to my mind is that Jesus had the power to completely destroy these demons hence their plea from them to be sent into the pigs. But if Jesus really could have permanently destroyed these demons, why did he choose to send them into the pigs? We learn afterwards that the pigs drowned in the river but it is not clear whether the demons perished too.

However, in the same scripture, the demons asked Jesus a question. They said "Have you come here to torture us before the appointed time?"

Does that explain that the demons that are cast out are not destroyed at all but merely leave the host body and and enter another body until the "appointed time" when they will be destroyed?

Genesis 6:2 says that the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful and married of them they liked and had children by them.

The sons of men who are the fallen angels are the first spiritual beings to have sex with humans and they are most probably the same demons that are still doing it now. The bible does not say anything about these fallen angels having sex with men nor does it say there are female angels. Maybe this could be the reason why women are the ones that are fearfully being tormented by these demons.

But on the contrary, we have heard of spirits or demons that sleep with men. Many men have also been said to be married to spiritual wives. You must also have heard of other people who use black magic to have sex with other persons in their sleep. Female witches may use this to have sex with men. Or could some of these horny demons be homosexual?

 Image courtsey of Stuart Miles freedigitalphotos.net

MAN VERSUS HIS PENIS AND EIGHT OTHER THINGS

Last Sunday, I was bored and so I decided to take a stroll to stretch my legs. It was during this time that I saw the advert in the photograph above. Of course the first thing that caught my eye was the large print text "NORMAL SIZE ENLARGEMENT". Below this were two numbers and a name which you can call at anytime if you have a problem with size. Unlike many other posters that advertise for "PENIS ENLARGEMENT", this one was a little bit different because it stated clearly that you will only get a normal size and not a monstrous item. Another fact that I liked about this advert is that it does not mention the name "Penis" which somehow leaves the little kids in the dark about what this size thing is all about.

Penis enlargement has become big business and those who know the secret of enlarging are really making money. When you see a poster like the one above, you will probably not think too much about it and may even laugh at it but the truth is many people ain't laughing at all but are dead serious with the whole thing. People have spent millions on penile enlargement products and are still spending. 

"Old men are also visiting us for manhood enlargement but our results are best between 7 and 37-years only. With old men we are receiving complaints that the manhood is getting back to its original size after enlargement. On manhood enlargement, we do ritual incision and the penis gets enlarged quickly while others just eat porridge mixed with powder charms and it gets enlarged." one traditional doctor was quoted in an online publication, an indication that it is not always that penis enlargement will work for everyone. But whether it works or not, the truth still remains that many men are going for it. 

I not sure whether the method mentioned by the traditional doctor above can fall under medical treatment or magic but the fact that many people go for it may just be proof that it works. Another reason why one must believe that it works is that you only get to pay after the results have been achieved. One thing worth mentioning here is that you should not by any means try and cheat the "doctor" by not paying him when you are required to. These "doctors" have means of getting back what you owe them.

On the list of services offered from the above poster, you will notice that there are eight other services and item number eight reads "SOMEONE IS OWING YOU OR DEBTS". This is a service which is offered to clients who have failed to get back the money which they are owed. Doesn't that simply explain why you should not avoid paying after your required penis size has been achieved?  The doctor offers service to clients on how to get their money back from people failing to pay which means he is an expert in getting back what you owe him. 

Let us look at the other services offered. Item number one is intriguing. "BRINGING BACK A LOST LOVER IN 45 MINUTES". This was not the first time that I was hearing about this but it was the first time that I heard this could happen that fast. I have heard many stories that if your lover runs away with another person, you can bring him or her back by just smoking some herbs and mentioning that person's name. This type of charm, is said to work even when you want someone to fall in love with you whether they want to or not. How can a simple "cigarette" accomplish all this? Spiritual powers are used in these rituals by calling out the name of the lost lover and sometimes this is done at night at a graveyard. In the western culture they call this a Love Spell and sometimes you can get them free of charge on the internet.

My interest about this was how quickly (45 minutes) it takes for the lost or runaway lover to come back. It is practically impossible for someone to get back that fast cos he or she may be thousands of kilometers away at the time. Could it be that the spell starts working after 45 minutes after being cast? According to the traditional healer quoted earlier in this article, some kind of oil is used and when the ritual is done, it makes the runaway lover "crazy" and they will want to come back. This will happen even if the lost lover has entered into another relationship. 

The second item is most likely a huge temptation for many people.  "WEALTH, LUCK, WINING LOTTO, MORE MONEY". Who wants to be poor anyway? I however have one question to ask. If these people know how to become rich and how to win the lotto, why are they in this business at all? Why not just be making your own money the easy way? I am asking this because most of the people that offer these "services" live in cheap neighborhoods hardly what you would call very rich. I cannot dwell too much on that because there are so many stories associated with these get rich quick schemes and maybe they choose not to use their ways due to the unpleasant things that one must do to get that wealth. 

Item number three dwells on "PASSING EXAMS, JOB INTERVIEWS AND JOB PROMOTION". I guess now you know why that promotion passed you by and went to someone who does not deserve it. I never knew life was this simple. While you study all night to pass the exam, there is an easy way out. How it is done is beyond imagination. How do the answers avail themselves to you in the examination room? Do you dream about them at night? Are you possessed by an imaginary force that can see the answers and whisper them to you? We can come up with many theories here but it still remains a mystery. 

To the interviewing panel, it was not your fault that you chose a dunderhead for the job but he was just one step ahead of you. He went for "consultation" from the traditional doctor.  

To the women who have been craving to get married but Mr Right has been elusive, you may find item number four exciting. "QUICK MARRIAGE, DIVORCE, STINGY HUSBAND". I have heard about "quick marriages" which sometimes come with a "getting married to a white man"enticement.  Yes, many African women dream of getting married to white man because it is believed that white men are generous and rich. Many desperate women have tried getting help for hooking up with men of their choice. This may just fit in with item number one which talks about bringing back a lost lover. I guess the methods used here may be the same with getting married to a person that you want to get married to. 

What is more confusing is the “divorce” part. Why would someone go to a “doctor” for a divorce? I thought you can get that from the Court. My concern with this one is that some people may use it for selfish gains. Imagine a woman who got married to man not because she loved him but because of his money. After a few years when she has amassed the wealth she wanted, she may get a divorce from the poor man through the influence of the herbs man. 

Stingy husbands have not been left out of his quagmire. There is a remedy for this too and may also be used for selfish gain. If a woman loves money, she may get the charms to make her husband start giving her all the money and even neglecting other responsibilities like supporting his extended family. It is common to hear people talk about women who are accused of feeding their husbands the head of the blue headed lizard, the Agama.

This lizard keeps nodding its head as if it is agreeing to something. It is believed if a woman feeds her husband this charm, he will say yes to everything that she says. He will say yes to every command that she gives him, even owning up his entire month’s pay. I just wonder if this can work the other way round if a man feeds the wife the same charms. Of course I have no proof of anyone being fed the lizard’s head but it is widely believed that it is part of the ingredients for this spell.

HIP ENLARGEMENT AND FIRM BREASTS falls under item number five and this one that I think can rake in a lot of money if well marketed. Many women these days are wearing padded pants and hip enhancers to make their bodies have a shape that they desire. Imagine having a tailor made body without the hassle of shopping for enhancers or going under the scalpel? 

However, it boggles the mind if one thinks about how this can be done by a traditional doctor. We have heard of breast implants and these are done by using silicone but how the hell does a traditional healer do it without surgery? Could it be done the same way that penis enlargement is done by drinking herbs or powders?  Whatever the case, I have no doubt that if we were told exactly how this is done, it would leave us spooked. 

Then comes Item number six, “STOP SMOKING AND DRINKING”. Although the basic rule to stopping anything is simply to stop doing it, I know that is not the case with beer and smoking. These are addictive and anything which is addictive is not easy to let go. Smoking is harmful to health and quitting is a very good option. There are more ways in which someone can quit smoking but I just don’t know if these fall in with the method used by the advertised service. The reason I say this is because you can get these tips freely through the internet. 

The second last item on our advert is for“THOSE WHO WANT BABIES”  followed of course by “THOSE OWING YOU MONEY ” which I covered at the top of this article.

Don't we have a remedy for everything?